Help Kids Through Their 1st Christmas Post-Divorce With These Tips

Divorces are emotional events for kids, especially around holidays and special family days according to most divorce law firms.

Suddenly, what had once been a family tradition will be completely different now that parents are no longer married.

Divorce lawyers find that even with good parenting, the first Christmas after a divorce can be upsetting for children of all ages.

The best way for parents to confront this possibility is by finding ways to help their kids - and themselves - through it in a way that reduces the tension and eases in these new circumstances.

Co-Parenting Through The Holidays

Attorneys with most divorce law firms advise their clients that pretending to be a whole family over the holidays, even if spouses divorced amicably, only delays the inevitable while reinforcing the idea that maybe mom and dad will still be together.

Instead of doing this, divorce attorneys suggest that co-parents come together to make the holidays about the kids, while also enforcing separate holiday time.

Some family time together to focus on the children is great as long as parents are on good terms, but there should also be plenty of separate time with each parent as well.

Divorce lawyers advise that creating a holiday schedule ahead of time that reflects what will be best for the kids is ideal, whether that means switching off holidays or spending one day with each parent on Christmas Eve and Day.

Most importantly, parents should avoid fighting over the kids and causing them more stress, instead doing everything they can to instill confidence in them that they are still loved and will have special time with each parent.

Creating New Holiday Traditions Can Help

A considerable issue that causes upset among children during their first Christmas after divorce according to divorce attorneys is the expectations that come with the holidays and the possibility of broken traditions.

While it will no longer be possible to uphold many of those traditions, the best way to move forward in making the years to come easier is by creating new traditions now.

Anything that promotes bonding time over the holidays like tree decorating, watching Christmas movies, driving around to see holiday lights, and more can become a tradition that gives kids something new to look forward to next year as attested by divorce lawyers.

Parents can continue existing traditions as well, as long as they are sensitive to how kids might react to the fact that their other parent is not there with them. 

Do What Is Right For The Kids at Christmas

Overall, the most important way that divorce lawyers agree that ex-spouses can help their kids through their first Christmas post-divorce is by being flexible, agreeable, and understanding.

Divorce law firms advise that by putting the focus on the kids and what will be best for them, co-parents can plan a critical role in their kids’ happiness as well as their own.

Military Divorce in Texas is Different – Understand the Process!

When a divorce involves a member of the military, divorce lawyers and divorcing spouses are required to follow a process that is slightly different than that of a standard civilian divorce.

Although few, these differences can make getting a military divorce more complex, especially if both spouses are military members or one spouse is actively deployed.

A divorce help lawyer experienced with military divorces can ensure that filing spouses go about the process the right way and avoid problems that can delay the final judgment.

  1. Serving Military Members With Divorce Papers - Unlike standard divorce cases where divorce papers can be served by email or other ways in Texas, papers must be served to military members in person only, even if they are deployed. Considering the challenge of serving a deployed military member, divorce attorneys might recommend that filing spouses wait until after deployment to file.
  2. Response Time When Served - Based on the SMRA or Service Members Relief Act, active-duty service members who are served with divorce papers are able to extend their response period up to 90 days. If they are deployed or will soon be deployed, divorce help attorneys can also help their active-duty clients delay any court hearings until after deployment, pushing the whole process back.
  3. State of Jurisdiction - Military members and their divorce lawyers can file for divorce within the state of Texas if the military member is stationed in or deployed from Texas, regardless of where their home of record.
  4. Extra Child Custody Provisions - As part of a military divorce in Texas, active duty spouses must make secondary provisions for custody and conservatorship if deployment could become a factor.
  5. Military Retirement Benefits - Military retirement benefits may not qualify as part of the community property that is usually divided up in a civilian divorce. Since this can be a complicated part of the military divorce process, spouses involved in one should seek the assistance of an experienced military divorce attorney who can help them through this process.

Although military divorces do follow the same basic process as any other one, divorce help lawyers stress the importance of filing with experienced help that can aid in the navigation of various family law rule differences.

Civilian spouses or even those who are military members themselves and are looking to divorce their military spouse can learn how to proceed most easily through their divorce by discussing it first with an experienced divorce help attorney.

Advice On Selecting The Best Attorney For Your Divorce

You may have friends and coworkers who speak about their divorce attorney as if it were perfectly normal to have one.

Though the costs of hiring a lawyer are prohibitive to the average person, there are actually ways to have legal representatives on retainer for a fraction of the cost of hiring one in an emergency.

Read here about how to find divorce lawyers and how to establish the relationship.

Take Time to Research

A good tip if you're looking to find a divorce attorney is to make sure you thoroughly investigate whether or not a certain lawyer will be a good fit.

It is generally a good idea to go over a few different divorce lawyers at a time and compare them to each other.

Get References From Friends and Family

Ask your friends and family for referrals if you are looking for a great divorce attorney.

Others that have had legal issues know how critical a good lawyer can be and will be best able to lead you in the right direction.

Get a few recommendations and then do your own research from there.

Check Out Divorce Lawyer Reviews

Look for reviews on local divorce lawyers online.

Finding a lawyer that you can trust and respect can be very difficult, so any advice that you can get can be very helpful.

Make sure the reviews you consider are on an independent site and take all comments with a grain of salt.

The goal is to find the general consensus.

Know The Fees for a Divorce Attorney

Wait to sign a contract with a divorce attorney until you feel the situation is right.

Request an estimate from the attorney so that you know approximately how many hours he or she intends on putting into the case.

If the lawyer refuses, move on as a range is acceptable, but it is not right if you have no idea what you are getting into.

Adding All This Up

Even if you have not had legal needs before, you now realize that it could happen at any time.

Whether your divorce appears to be a simple one or one that could drag on for a long time, it is imperative to have an experienced divorce attorney.

Take what you have learned here and put it to use in finding the divorce lawyer that you may need.